The above are a series of free talks I am giving in the coming months about empowering women and men.
The first workshop is for International Women’s Day on the theme of Narcissism/Emotional abuse on 22nd February from 10.00-1.00pm GMT online.
I am delivering the talks in partnership with The Women’s Consortium a charity committed to helping women and men of all ethnicities build their emotional resilience and recognise their personal/professional value.
Please check out the online workshops below if you are interested or know others who might be.
Look who kept trying to trip me up yesterday on a walk through Horsenden wood? Apparently Robins symbolise hope, renewal, rebirth. Folklore believe that if you make a wish on a Robin then that wish will come true. The Robin can be a reminder of Christmas past and good times. It is also said that ‘when robins appear, loved one’s are near.’ Robins like all birds are seen as spiritual messengers who link heaven with earth. The Spiritual Centre website explain that the robin is ‘a welcome visitor bringing gifts, it is for you to interpret the gifts it brings.’
The Robin is seen as a symbol of spring asking us to let go of the shackles of the past and embrace a new happier phase, to trust in the future, have faith, to transform and grow. The Bach flower essence Honeysuckle has a similar powerful effect on our emotional wellbeing. By looking through rose tinted glasses we may be nostalgic for happier times or perhaps we look back on the past with a sense of regret and disappointment. Bach Flower Remedy Honeysuckle can help us to move forward and focus more on the present. The past or it’s important lessons will not be forgotten but it can allow greater flexibility of mind and vitality to focus on the present and embrace the future. For further information on the Bach Flower Remedies and how they might help you please see http://www.waterlighthealing.com
Midwinter or the winter solstice is a time of reflection – going inside to gather one’s energy and strength, a time of letting go – releasing old patterns of thinking and behaviour that no longer serve us and resetting our intention for the year ahead. Christmas festivities are based on the ancient pagan celebration of Saturnalia. A time when work, business and schools closed and great feasting and revelry took place. In some places Masters also served their servants.
However midwinter can also be seen as the ‘dark night of the soul.’ When the shadow has overtaken the light within and can result in extreme mental anguish leaving the personality facing complete annihilation. This is not an ordinary despair or hopelessness however but total suffering leaving the individual feeling that they have reached ‘the end of the road.’ In these cases the Bach Flower essence Sweet Chestnut can restore the strength needed to cope with inevitable change and loss in our lives. What can the poets teach us about midwinter? ‘Winter is for women’ (Wintering) wrote Sylvia Plath in 1962 written in one of the harshest winters in 100 years or Carol Ann Duffy, ‘that trick we have of turning love to pain.’ (Wintering) who writes that love oftentimes is bittersweet. Or Katherine May, who ask us ‘to invite the winter in’ like an old friend so that we may let go of the old and welcome the new.
The Transformational nature of Bach Flower Remedies ‘Rescue Remedy’
What is it?
Rescue Remedy is the UK’s number one emotional wellbeing brand according to Holland & Barrett and Nelsons Homeopathic Pharmacy. It is a 5 remedy combination using the original Bach Flower remedies to help deal with life stresses and strains ie juggling home and work, giving presentations/talks at work, relationships and other more serious challenges involving upset or shock such as bereavement, going into hospital, being given bad news etc.
A few years ago a colleague who attended a funeral took her Rescue Remedy out from her bag to help calm her upset and found several other women did the same thing. Rescue Remedy is part of the Bach Flower remedies system of vibrational medicine discovered by Dr Edward Bach in 1930s in the UK and has been used by millions of people all over the world ever since.
Who uses it?
‘I always have Rescue Remedy with me in my purse in case one of my kids falls or is just having a tough day.’ (Gwyneth Paltrow)
‘A few drops of this under my tongue before I go out calms me down. It’s in my make-up bag at all times.’ (Emma Watson)
‘When I do plays I get so nervous that my mum prepares theatre survival packs for me. They might contain chocolate, lemons, honey, ginger shots and Rescue Remedy.’ (Emilia Fox)
(Souce: Nelson’s Homeopathic Pharmacy)
It is not surprising that so many actors rely on Rescue Remedy. Fear of public speaking (glossophobia) remains a high ranking fear up there alongside the fear of death. Laurence Olivier who was arguably the Greatest Actor of all time said, ‘I am not, I am afraid a very good talker. It causes me a more intense amount of mental upset then it does I think, most people.’ (21st April 1955) When performing on stage Olivier would regularly request a bucket at the side of the stage to throw up in.
Linda Brennan, Psychologist in her forthcoming book, Stage Fright in the Actor writes about the laboured breathing, cold sweats and palpitations that some actors experience. Along with dry mouth, choking sensation and sleepless nights, these are all conditions that most people can empathise with. She argues that the general public do not realise what some actors can suffer for their art. But these anxieties could affect anyone from a teacher standing in front of a class to a student giving a presentation to professionals giving a high powered pitch to their Manager
Nelsons Homeopathic Pharmacy donated 60 000 products to frontline staff all over the world during the Covid pandemic.
‘I work nights in the local hospitals a&e department it’s been helping make shifts more manageable ???? so thank you very much…stay safe’ (Nelsons.net)
What is in it?
The 5 Bach flower remedies are Rock Rose for courage, Impatiens for patience, Clematis for grounding, Star of Bethlehem for comfort and Cherry Plum for emotional control. The remedies are natural, safe and gentle to use and do not interfere with the actions of other medications or complementary therapies.
How does it work?
The flowers are still handpicked in Oxford and made according to Dr Bach’s specifications 80 years ago.
How to take
4 drops on the tongue directly from the stock bottle, or 4 drops in a glass of water or made up into a customised treatment bottle.
For further information please do not hesitate to contact me.
The transformational power of using Bach Flower Remedies this Easter
Today is Palm Sunday a day widely recognised by Christians all over the world as the day Jesus rode triumphantly into Jerusalem. It is the start of holy week culminating in the death and resurrection of Christ.
Easter traditionally is a time of re-birth, renewal, contemplation – a quiet time of reflection, looking inwards, the Bach Flower Remedies can help us to reset and rebalance our emotions and our life at this time of year.
The stages of change
The process of personal change goes through several cycles. One such theory of change is by Prochaska and Di Clemente, the first stage is precontemplation – not quite ready for change yet, contemplation – is the process of getting ready, preparation – ready to take the leap, next is the call to action and the final phase is maintenance or lasting change. However like love the path to real and lasting change never runs as smoothly as the framework suggests.
There will be many false starts, setbacks, meanderings etc before you reach your end goal. This is where the Bach Flower Remedies can help to steer our path and keep us on it. Identify what areas of your life you would like to change. Meaningful change has to be from the inside out, something you really want to achieve or need. Change that is important to you, that really matters to you not anyone else. What do you want to change in your life?
Example of Personal goals
Confidence has been shown to be a high correlator with personal or career success. How you think about yourself has consequences for your self-esteem and finding your own rightful place in the world. Larch Bach Flower Remedy can help with issues of confidence.
Empathy being able to put ourselves in the shoes of others is so important right now in the world. It is about knowing our personal/professional boundaries and those of others. This is where Walnut Bach Flower Remedy can help us to reinforce those boundaries and not transgress them.
Self Understanding includes contemplative questions such as Who am? What do I want from my life? What are my values? What is my purpose? Self understanding encompasses self care and self love that helps us to be more resilient. This is a reflective ongoing piece of work that will change over the course of our lives as we change. It could be helpful to journal ideas, make a mood board etc.
You could learn something different such as a joining a class, start a new creative activity such as writing, painting, drawing, learning code etc. What did you enjoy when you were younger? Could you take up any of those activities again? Look to the past for ideas on how to develop a well rounded future self.
Active listening is about learning to pay attention and listen deeply with your whole being. It is not only listening to what is being said but perhaps more importantly it is about what is not being said. Paying attention to body language, eye contact, tone of voice etc. The only way to develop deep listening skills is to practice as much as possible with family, friends and colleagues. Deep listening is not always as easy as it looks.
Procrastination It is important to be able to have the energy, enthusiasm and motivation for the goals that we want to set in our lives. Here the Hornbeam Bach Flower Remedy can help us to set realistic goals and to stick to them.
What changes would you like to make in your life right now?
We are encouraged to set SMART goals that are specific, measurable, achievable, realistic and timely. It helps to take 1 step at a time. Focus on small achievable goals. Goals should be positive and about you. We can’t change other people’s behaviour only our own, attitude, way of thinking.
It helps to write down goals, get them out of our heads and down on paper. Goals will inevitably change over time, become more refined etc. How will you know when you have achieved your goal? What will it look like? Smell like, taste like, feel like etc.
Happy Easter everyone. Don’t forget to make time for yourself and your loved ones at this important time of year.
If you would like to find our more about the Bach Flower Remedies press here.
Today is the Vernal or spring equinox a time of rebirth and new beginings. The first day of spring. Metaphorically it heralds the return of the Greek Goddess Persephone from her time spent in the Underworld bringing with her a sense of renewal, optimism and hope for the future as the earth wakes up. While seen as a good time for spring cleaning and getting our house in order, is it also time for an emotional spring clean?
Walnut – Bach Flower Remedy
During this time of seasonal change, the walnut Bach Flower remedy can help protect those who temporarily are sensitive to outside influences and interference and help us to stay true to our own developmental path in life. Sometimes called the link breaker Edward Bach called walnut the great spell breaker. In this respect it is a important remedy to take with Honeysuckle in cutting the cords of the past. Who originally influenced us? Our parents? Families? Teachers? Friends? Are you still carrying around their expectations, their belief systems, their values?
This remedy can also help with supporting major life transitions such as pregnancy, teething, birth, adolescence, mid life, retirement, surgery and the final journey. These are seen as natural life changes that are internally driven but what about external changes such as marriage, redundancy, divorce, changing jobs, moving house, emigration? Walnut is both an agent of change and protection from the adverse effects of that change.
Nowruz – Persian New Year
The walnut tree originally came from Persia which today is also the Persian/Iranian New Year or Nowruz. Part of the Nowruz origin story is about King Jamshid a ruler who was sensitive to his people and the cycles of the earth.
While we know on an unconscious level that nothing stays the same, that change is inevitable, the whole process can trigger stress hormones such as adrenaline and cortisol sometimes making that change painful and hard to deal with. Whether change is seen as good, bad or indifferent it is how it is anticipated and reacted to that makes the difference to our emotional and physical wellbeing.
Unsurprisingly then the words we use to describe change has a powerful impact on constructing our notions of self, reality and shaping the way we see the world as either a safe or dangerous place to live in. Again these ideas may have developed in childhood but no longer serve us in adulthood.
We are without doubt living in a time of unprecedented change and upheaval. In order to anchor ourselves in the physical world and not just in our heads think about and perhaps write down the words we use to construct our own belief systems. For example if you frequently find yourself thinking or saying, ‘life is full of suffering’ change it to ‘life is full of joy’ or ‘I am a failure’ change it to ‘I am a success’ (Gill Edwards) If you want to say your positive affirmations our loud several times to change your mental outlook on life. Listen to the words you use to describe yourself and others, remember words are powerful. Always try to speak your truth.
Walnut is especially useful for those working in the helping professions such as Doctors, Nurses, Therapists, Counsellors who may inadvertently take on the negative emotional energies of the people they help on a daily basis. It is about being clear about our own emotional/psychological boundaries in order to contain the strong emotions of others. Sipping a glass of water with 4 drops of walnut between each client will help us to remain true to ourselves and not be overwhelmed by the needs of our clients.
The positive aspects of change
Walnut types are strong people who know what they want from life and where they are going but sometimes get sidetracked by the needs, aspirations and wishes of others. Walnut can help us to find our inner compass so we do not get blown off course easily and find our own way back. It helps us to find an inner steadfastness. Walnut works on so many levels to cut the cords of the past to help set us free. It helps with personal/professional development and also paves the way so that we are open to change and growth. Where are you on your life’s journey and where do you want to be? Honestly? Walnut will give us the strength to meet life’s challenges head on with equanimity.
For more information about how the Bach Flower Remedies may help you navigate your path through life, please don’t hesitate to contact me for further advice. Love, light and healing always.
The past 12 months have been unlike any other in living memory and the next 12 months well who knows what the future might hold? What can we do enhance our emotional resilience in the meantime? The upcoming year can bring greater appreciation and positivity – if we are willing to put in the work first. Now more than ever we need to connect, collaborate and participate. Not just for our mental wellbeing but our very survival may depend on it.
We need a deeper awareness and understanding of who we truly are and what we really want for ourselves, our families and communities. It is important not to succumb to the dense nature of negative emotions that weigh heavily in body, heart and mind. So how do we stay positive, proactive and present to ourselves and others? We are not bystanders or passengers, but the active travellers on our life’s journey.
1. Daily practice such as mindfulness and breath awareness will help us to reconnect with our bodies. Take us out of our heads and into somatic experiencing of our bodies ie bodily awareness. The breath anchors the body firmly to the present moment. Try not to ruminate on the past or become anxious about an unknown and as yet foreseeable future. These anxieties stress us. Breathe in deeply through the nose, feel your diaphragm move, and expel all of the old stale air from your lungs. Relax and release what no longer serves you.
You do not need to empty your mind, we have thousands of thoughts a day so it would be near on impossible to do so. Place your hands comfortably in your lap, try to relax your body as much as you can. Notice areas of tension and breathe into it ie your jaw, throat, belly, shoulders, back. Breathe in love for yourself and others and breathe out negative emotions such as resentment, anger etc. Try to relax like this at least twice a day more if you are able to and watch the tension melt from your body.
2. Sleep is the body and mind’s rest and repair mechanism. Research shows that that the quality and quantity of sleep is important for energy levels and clarity of thought through out the day. Try to set up a similar routine every night. Turn devices off in good time and give your body and mind time to relax, unwind. Traditionally tryptophan (amino acid) in warm milky drinks have a soporific effect.
Sometimes individuals struggle with going to sleep or staying asleep due to intrusive thoughts, anxiety and sometimes people have night terrors where they need to keep the light on. There are Bach Flower Remedies that may help the mind to gently let go of what no longer serves us. White Chestnut is a particularly effective remedy for sleeplessness. Sometimes called the thought flower, it is for lack of interest in the present moment, for mental chatter and intrusive thoughts. It is quite a fast acting remedy.
3. Walking, being in nature helps us to connect with a higher purpose and can give our lives meaning. Movement is important as more and more of us work from home, home school etc. Research shows the value of exercise for mental and physical wellbeing. Practices such as Yoga, Tai chi, Qi Gung integrates the false duality of body and mind. You cannot separate the body from the mind.
4. Try to reduce stress and pressure both internal and external as much as you can. As this impacts on the body’s immune system to fight disease. When we are stressed the body produces stress hormones such as Adrenaline and Cortisol. It is these hormones that are responsible for the fight/flight/freeze response in the body. Over a long period of time these hormones can result in a stress vulnerability to disease. Again there are remedies to help the body and mind to relax.
5. Try to eat a balanced healthy diet everyday, food is the building block of bodies and brains and frontline defence against disease. Stay well hydrated drinking 1.5 to 2 litres a day to avoid headaches, tiredness, dry skin etc.
6. Connect with others on a daily basis if you can remotely or via the phone. It is through others that we learn who we are and what we are really made of. Our relationship to self and others will be our most satisfying and most profound experiences of our life. Bringing both joy and sadness. Nothing lasts and loss is inevitable therefore remember to walk lightly and treat others with kindness.
7. Practise positive psychology, look for the joy in the everyday, giving back, serving others helps us to find true our natures. Staying positive strengthens our immune system and could increase longevity.
If you would like to book a Bach Flower Consultation then please click here.